0-xcopy - Letter to Defer

I was sleeping with both eyes open.
Not sure if I was asleep or I had slept.
I was missing what I was taking.
Saw my dilemma. Should I sleep forever?

Throw my ashes to Ganges.
I'll be just dirt to white.

I was slowly crawling on it.
These lights suddenly washed me off there.
I was wishing to end it all and,
Make it into a pitchblack silence.

Closing my eyes for a dream,
A dream of a neverland,
A land which is the furthest,
And I'm outraced and twofaced.

I will have a sleep in peace now,
With a smile on my ugly face.
I will have it all reversed now.
Things seem much more weirder.

Came into my life really fast,
Really fast and I liked it.
It's my shame I didn't look,
At it for the last time.

My wrists are itching.
I should take care of it.
My wrists are itching.
This suffering is bleeding.

Twisted hair, those eyes that stare,
Can't imagine what it really means to me.
I'll talk till I lose all my voice.
Then I'll dream on.

That river is where I belong.
Was born crying, will die crying.